Obits at Sixty-Seven

i do not know why
my hands turn the pages to
the obits
and
my eyes scan the listings there;
i am not from here,
and
not likely to know anyone
heralded as dead here,
and
if i did know someone
buried there in the obits,
i would already know
their kin, their age,
the disease or what it was
which killed them;
so why do i go there?
i ask myself with
no real answer;
yet
i go there almost daily,
scanning, reading the curious obits,
hoping i really won’t know anyone listed there,
passing by most of the really aged,
perhaps because i ain't there yet,
wondering
who these dead folks really were,
what were they really like,
if they died nobly,
how their loved ones feel, really feel,
about this death thing
and
what made them write or contribute
the words to the obit,
including or omitting pertinent facts
and
what were those omitted facts
and
realizing i am sad they are gone,
but
perhaps because
i am getting a bit long in the tooth,
i go to the obits
and
i am damn glad
it’s not me
listed in the obits.

Bonita, California
January 19, 2011